Today was supposed to be "Through My Eyes Thursday" ... and I planned on reviewing "The Dark Knight"... But I just didn't feel like vlogging. I'm so tired and worn out from work. Maybe I should start recording all of my videos on the weekend and then just post them accordingly...
To sum up "The Dark Knight" - It was awesome. Amazing camera work in my opinion... dizzying at times, but I felt that was the point. And I absolutely loved that Heath Ledger's part was written so well. Yes, he did an amazing job at invoking this sick and twisted persona... as I expected... but a lot of the credit really should go to the writer. He had all of the best scenes and lines in my opinion. And no one could have delivered those lines quite like he did... so sad that we'll never get to see him bring an amazing character to life again.
Anyway.
Do you ever think of something you did like 5 years ago and then just hate yourself for having done whatever it was? I do.
In fact, I think of things I've done a few weeks ago and hate myself for it.
Actually, I probably only like myself for the present 5 minutes. Right now I'm pretty cool. But 5 minutes ago I sucked... and 5 minutes from now I will think I sucked now.
Does that make sense to you?
I'm just not very happy right now and I'm not sure why. Well, I kind of know why. I'm playing a victim to my circumstances. I sort of hate my job. I really hate my job. And I'm just kind of bored of the life I created for myself.
But I can be kind of stubborn... so it's hard for me to admit that I'm not super happy in L.A. since I convinced my parents (back in Brooklyn) that I'm soooo happy I moved here.
Not that I don't like L.A. It's fine. Lovely weather. I just don't like the boring life I'm leading. Work. Eat. Vlog. Sleep. Friends? Occasionally.
Something needs to change. I'm not sure what exactly my plan is yet... but something is changing, I assure you. I'm not the kind of girl that just sits and lets myself be unhappy. Hence the moving across the country thing. And I've been known to just randomly quit jobs because I was unhappy... I'm a big believer in striving to get what you want and what will make you happy - even if it might entail ridiculous measures.
So I'm not sure what it will be yet. Honestly, what I would LOVE to do is just be able to travel the world and randomly live in places for short periods of time as I vlog and write my little heart out. But that's not something I can really accomplish with the debt that's following me. Damn it.
But SOMETHING is going to change... so far it will be one of or a few of the following:
1 - Find a new day job.
2 - Move back to NY.
3 - Move to a different state (other than Cali and NY).
4 - Move to another country.
5 - Maybe I should try to freelance PA?
6 - Whatever else I can think of.
Hmm...
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