Day 9 - Fast - I Bet I Can Last Longer Than 10 Days

Today I felt completely normal in every way. Actually, I probably felt better than normal.

After lunch, the girl sitting in the cubicle next to mine was going on and on about how she didn't feel well and how she was tired and blah blah blah. I was thinking that I'M the one that should be feeling like that, right? I mean... I've always thought no food = sick, weak and tired. Somehow this was not the case.

I started drinking orange juice today and am officially done with the lemon/lime crap. I was a bit nervous that the transition would be painful or have some sort of negative effect. Nope, I was fine.

I took a moment and thought to myself,"I have not eaten in 9 days. I HAVE NOT EATEN IN 9 DAYS! How is this humanly possible?"

I cut myself to make sure I was still human. I was worried lemon/lime juice would start bleeding out of me... but no, still blood.

Of course I didn't cut myself, you silly nilly!

But seriously, I honestly don't understand how I could be feeling this normal after 9 days of not eating. Oh well, whateves. :::shrugs:::

Not only am I alive and well... but I had no cravings today. I didn't fantasize about food. Which was odd.

My office manager bought pizza for everyone. When offered, I declined. Obviously because of the fast. Who the hell declines free food?

But the amazing part of this was that when I declined the pizza, I was totally cool with it. I didn't have this longing "if it wasn't for this damn fast I could eat that" kind of feeling that I had been experiencing for most of this endeavor.

I'm very happy about that because it leads me to believe that I will really be able to make some changes to the way I eat. Let's hope.

Weight Loss: 10 lbs
Hunger: None.
Emotions/State of Mind: Normal, if not better.
Daydream Food of The Day: None! WTF?

Day 8 - Fast - Goodbye Lemon/Lime Crap & Hello Orange Juice!

Today was my last day consuming lemon/lime juice. For the next two days... the last two days of my fast (YES!)... I will be drinking orange juice in preparation for eating solid food.

I must say, day 8 was a piece of cake. Mmmm cake :::drool:::

No but seriously, today was probably the easiest day by far. Even easier than the weekend when all I did was go to the grocery store (for limes and orange juice), go online, and sleep.

I felt energized, healthy, and happy. I even got complimented on the "glow" of my complexion today. Which I loved since I'm sure anyone reading this is assuming I'm pale with dark circles under my eyes and ready to pass out at any given moment.

For any of you that are going to take this on... I'll have you know - day 8 is smooth sailing.

I still fantasize about food though. Food is my lover.




Weight Loss: 10 lbs
Hunger: Not even a little bit.
Emotions/Mental State: Good as any other day. The only things bringing me down were the norm... such as my job.
Daydream Food of The Day: Anything cheesy and delicious!!! MmMmMm

Day 7 - Fast - Still Not Dead! Yay!

It is officially an entire week since I began this fast. I kind of can't believe it. Of course I have been committed to completing this fast... and many other people have done this before... but I couldn't really SEE myself not eating for this long of a period. But here I am... with not a single piece of food in my tummy for a whole week straight.

Some people have been inquiring if I've "cheated" at all. I won't lie, I've been tempted. There were times that I would tell myself a few little crackers won't hurt anyone, no one will know! Someone would've known... me. And really that's all that matters.

Fasting over the weekend was a bit easier than fasting at work. I guess because my job makes my day go by painfully slow... with or without food.

Just a few more days to go! Amazing.

Weight Loss: 8 lbs
Hunger: A few moments of hunger through the day... okay for the majority.
Emotions/State of Mind: Felt really good today.
Daydream Food of The Day: Mozzarella sticks! Yum. And mmm.

Fast - Day 6 - Limes FTW

Today I woke up and I'll be honest... I felt pretty weak. It was the weakest I've felt since I began this fast. I realized it was because I didn't drink enough juice yesterday. The reason behind this is... I'm friggen sick of lemon juice! So sue me.

Apparently, you can also make the juice with limes. So I went to the supermarket and picked up some limes. 

Sigh, the supermarket smelled so beautiful. This heightened sense of smell thing is pretty cool.

I decided I will be drinking lime rather than lemon juice for the remainder of this fast. It was so much better! But who knows, maybe that's because I'm just so sick of lemons at this moment.

ALSO - I've made a slight alteration to the way the 10 day fast is SUPPOSED to be played out. After the 10 days you need to only drink orange juice for 2 more days without food, in order to prepare your body to process solid food again. Then on the third day you're only supposed to eat fresh fruit and vegetables in order to get your system running again.

Which sort of results in a 12 day fast. The problem is... I REALLY need to be able to eat solid food on Friday. It's my last day at my current job and we plan on having a "goodbye lunch". It would kind of suck ass to have to only drink orange juice at MY goodbye lunch while everyone else has a lovely feast!

Plus I made dinner plans on Friday before I realized I might not be able to eat solid food...

So I decided to start drinking orange juice on Tuesday, which will be day 9 of the fast. This way Friday will be the first day I can eat REAL food.

I'm not considering it a cop out considering that on day 9 and 10 I still can't eat food. I can only drink orange juice.

If it wasn't for the situation I probably would go for the full 12 days... at this point I know I can do it. 

Meh... 8 days on lemon/lime juice crap and 2 days on orange juice ain't too shabby in my eyes.

***IMPORTANT: PLEASE READ THIS IF YOU ARE INTERESTED IN DOING THIS FAST - I have received a bunch of emails and blogtv pm's asking about this fast because they are interested in doing it. I do NOT want to give you the recipe for the juice myself because I don't want to misguide you. If this is not done properly it can be VERY dangerous. If you are really interested in doing this, please email me at denisevlogs@gmail.com. I will send you the .pdf file that you need to read in order to know how to do this right. Also, if you are under 18 I don't advise that you try this. :)

Weight Loss: 8 lbs

Hunger: Very little in the morning.

Emotions/Mental State: Fairly normal.

Daydream Food of The Day: Cold Stone's birthday cake signature creation... mmm ice cream.

Fast - Day 5 - No Thanks, I'm Not Hungry

Something amazing happened today. Something I didn't think was humanly possible. Maybe I'm dead. That would suck.

Anyway... the amazing thing was I felt NO hunger today. Seriously. The past 4 days I felt at least a little bit of hunger and had immense cravings... but today, nope. Hmm, I still had some cravings.

Well, not cravings exactly. It was different than the way I craved food the past few days. Before I would crave certain foods like I would do anything to have them. Like I NEEDED them. Today it was more like I was reminiscing over the memory of food.

How can I explain this...

Okay, this is weird, but it's the best comparison. It's kind of like when a pet dies. When my little Maltese, Crumpet, died 4 years ago I was devastated. I cried for days and missed her dearly for maybe a year. Maybe less, I can't remember. Whenever my little pup would come to mind I felt a longing to pet and play with her.

But now, 4 years later, when Crumpet comes to mind I just have nice thoughts but I don't feel a longing or a sadness. I don't NEED Crumpet anymore. It's okay now. But if she somehow came back to life I would be very happy to see her. But only if she isn't a zombie dog. What? Let's back on track...

Did I just compare food to a dead dog? Yes. Yes I did.

So initially I missed food dearly and craved for it to be in my tummy... but now it's okay. I don't hunger for it and my cravings are not driving me mad. Yet I still have the memory of food and I still look forward to when food and I can once again be together <3 src="file:///Users/Denise/Library/Caches/TemporaryItems/moz-screenshot.jpg" alt="">

Weight Loss: 6 lbs.
Hunger: None.
Emotions/Mental State: Had a little bit of trouble concentrating. But I think maybe I was just feeling done with the week and didn't want to work.
Daydream Food of The Day: Chicken marsala over bow tie pasta (as seen in the picture above). MmMmMmM :)

Fast - Day 4 - Food Association

It's the end of Day 4 and I'm kind of amazed I've made it this far. I mean, not really... because I have every intention of sticking it out till day 10. But I also know myself, and in knowing myself I know that I'm very weak when it comes to temptation. Sadly, self control is far from my strongest virtue.

For some reason this time I've been holding out well. I could easily cheat. I don't have to tell you guys. But I really didn't... and I'm amazed. I guess I'm actually trying to prove something to myself.

Today was long. It was also odd. I barely felt hungry today, but something in my body was kind of strange feeling. It's hard to describe. The only word I can think of to clarify how my body felt is rusty. I wasn't in pain or achy or anything... I just felt rusty. 

I don't know if you can imagine that. It seems like one of those things you have to experience. According to the text I have on this fast, some people notice problems with their joints. I guess that's what this was. It's supposed to be normal and okay if it happens. Normal my ass, that was weird.

I craved food less today than the other days. That was awesome. 

Something I realized about myself today; most of my cravings come from either emotional distress or association.

The emotions thing is obvious. Many people eat when they're upset, angry, stressed or whatever. 

On the other hand, the association thing was kind of odd to realize. Today I really took note of it. When I would hear a certain song (fine, fine, it's a Miley Cyrus song, damn it), I'd crave Thai food. I guess I would listen to that song as I drove to pick up Thai food on many occasions.

When I watch Lost, I crave double chocolate chip cookies. Probably because I would snack on that a lot as I watched it.

When I'm writing, I crave an ice cream sandwich. I suppose I've rewarded myself with an ice cream sandwich after writing on many occasions.

Is this a stupid realization? I don't know, maybe. I just know that without food there, I feel like I'm able to find the root of the desire for it. If I'm able to consciously realize why I'm craving something, maybe I can control myself in the future and maintain a healthier diet. Just a thought.

One more thing. I noticed that fasting seriously raises your sense of smell. I think I've mentioned this before, but it's worth mentioning again. It's kind of amazing. Sometimes I almost feel satisfied by just breathing in a yummy smelling meal... well, not really.

Weight Loss: 4lbs

Hunger: Barely hungry.

Emotions/Mental State: Normal emotions and mental state. Possibly a bit irritable, but I think it's because my day was very long and draining.

Daydream Food of The Day: Ihop breakfast special - which consists of scrambled eggs, sausage links, bacon, ham, hash browns and a stack of pancakes. Mmmmm breakfasty foods, delicious.

Fast - Day 3 - Am I Dead Yet?

Remember yesterday how I thought I would wake up feeling violently sick? And then how I thought it was silly of me to think that that could happen... yeah, I spoke too soon.

Today was bad. Real bad. Maybe it's because my friend warned me it would be the worst day. Could have been all in my head. But no, I don't think so.

I woke up feeling like a sledge hammer was grinding into my head and my stomach was sucked dry with a vacuum... with a lovely touch of nausea. But the nausea had no relief because there was NOTHING IN MY STOMACH.

I called out sick from work. Meh, it's my last two weeks there anyhow... but that's a whole different story...

After calling out I went back to sleep and slept till 11am. Which is late considering I'm up at 6am most mornings.

When I woke up I felt a lot better. There was no pain, but I felt very weak and like something was just wrong.

I was getting very nervous. Maybe this was a bad idea. What the fuck am I doing? NOT EATING FOR 10 DAYS? Who do I think I am? Gandhi??

I almost gave in. Not for the sake of cravings... because this morning for the first time in 2 days I wasn't having any cravings at all. I just feared for my health. So I almost gave in and had some cheese puffs (trader joe's). That's all I have in my apartment right now.

But then I stopped myself as I reached for the bag and asked myself the following questions:

Isn't this supposed to be a part of the process anyway? 3rd day is supposed to be killer, right? Yes.

Won't eating cheese puffs as my first meal in 2 days probably only make me feel sicker? Pretty sure.

Are you a quitter? No way jose!

So I went and made some more lemon crap juice, drank it down and told myself to stop being a little bitch, and I felt all better within 2 hours.

I'm okay now. Looking forward to tomorrow.

Dear God, if you exist, please don't let me wake up the way I woke up today. Thanks.

Weight Loss: 3 lbs since the night of day 1.
Hunger: Only slight hunger towards the end of the day.
Mind/Emotions: I was thinking "OMG I FEEL SICK".
Daydream Food of The Day: Double Chocolate Chip Cookies... mmm... yes I will be saying mmm after every daydream food. They deserve it.

Fast - Day 2 - Lemon Crap

Today was harder. Well, I guess that's pretty apparent. Two days without food would obviously be more difficult than one. Yeah.

It started out okay. Last night I feared I would wake up feeling violently sick. I don't know why I imagined that happening... I guess because I've never gone more than 4 hours without eating before. I told you, I really like food!

I was fine. Till lunch came around. I felt hungry this time. I don't think I drank enough lemon crap juice. I call it lemon "crap" juice because I'm not very fond of it and as each hour passes without food I begin to grow a personal hatred towards the juice. As if the JUICE is what keeps the food from being with me... the juice comes between me and my love! 

Um. That was weird. It was the hunger talking.

Anyway. I'm kidding, it's not that bad. I'm not THAT hungry. 

I took a nap in my car during lunch. Is that odd? I needed to distract myself from the normal lunchtime thing, plus I felt sleepy... it seemed only logical.

Yeah, so I got through day 2 fairly well. And it was a very long day requiring lots of energy. I was fairly impressed by how I held up. Yay me.

Looking forward to day 3. Well, looking forward to day 10 really. But 3 is getting there. My friend told me that tomorrow is supposed to be the worst day. Oh joy!

Weight Loss: 2lbs ... since last night.

Hunger: Pretty hungry, but manageable.

Emotions/Mental State: On and off cranky and happy. I think I didn't get enough sleep.

Daydream Food of The Day: Sprinkles cupcakes. Mmm dark chocolate cupcake... coooome to me.

Fast - Day 1 - Food Is Everywhere

Well, I made it through the first day. It wasn't so bad. This lemon juice stuff must be magic or something because I should definitely be feeling more hungry than this.

Today I learned a lot about myself and my relationship with food. Which is awesome because that's already a benefit I've gained from this. So even if I quit now (which I won't!), I'll still have learned some things about my eating habits and I'll be able to consciously change them.

The morning went by quickly. Around 12pm I was waiting for my stomach to growl... as it normally does around that time. Lunch in Hollywood is 1pm... so the entire hour of 12pm starving and on the edge of my seat. But not this time. This time I was cool.. no growl.. no glancing at the clock every 5 minutes. In fact, I accidentally stayed 10 minutes over. It was sort of refreshing.

At lunch time I distracted myself by going to the bank and taking a walk around the neighborhood. And I realized... food is EVERYWHERE. I felt like there was at least 10 different restaurants or quick snack spots on every block. And they were eating. THEY WERE ALL EATING!

Whew. But it was okay. I still didn't feel hungry. But... I craved it. I craved the action of sitting and eating. I longed for the taste of a sandwich or an Asian fusion dish or whatever the hell else I could get my hands on. I just wanted to smell, chew, taste food. But I didn't NEED it. It was weird.

Lunch passed and I was once again safe from the exposure to food.

But then... oh but then... I get a pop up from the office manager. He sent it out to the entire office.

"Everyone please come into the kitchen for Phil's birthday! Cake in the kitchen!"

Cake in the kitchen. OF COURSE there's cake in the kitchen. Why wouldn't there be cake in the kitchen on the first day of my fast?

We enter the kitchen. We sing. We laugh (well, THEY laugh). And then he cuts the cake... and he hands me a slice. I say no thanks and run the hell out of there.

As the day went on I continued to feel okay with my lack of food. But my cravings became stronger. I would fantasize about the foods I COULD be eating. I began to REALLY take note of people snacking around me.

I also realized the lack of food sort of slowed my day down. Munching on some pretzels or crackers somehow helps the time pass. Which is another lesson learned... I often eat out of boredom. But don't we all?

When I got home, I started to feel hungry. So I drank some more lemon crap juice and told myself to shut the hell up. The family next door was cooking. They were cooking fish, which normally would kind of gross me out because I hate the smell of cooking fish for some reason (even though I eat it, I don't know either). But this time it was the most beautiful smell. The most alluring smell.

Yeah... then I drank some more lemon juice.

And now I'm drinking tea.

But I made it. I made it through day one.

I still fucking hate tea.

Weight Loss: Not sure, forgot to weigh myself yesterday. Besides, this fast isn't really for that reason.
Hunger: Slight feelings of hungry. Overall not too bad.
Emotions/Mental State: I feel pretty good actually. Maybe even better than on a food filled day.
Daydream Food of The Day: Roscoe's Waffles & Chicken... mmm.

Fast!

"You're doing what?"

"I'm fasting for 10 days."

"But.. but.. why?"

So yeah. I decided to fast for 10 days starting tomorrow.

The burning question ... why? Why oh why would you give up something so beautiful such as food? I know... I'm a big fan of food as well. Especially the yummy kind... trust me.

Honestly there is no epic and amazing reason why I'm doing this. I wish there was. I wish I was some awesome person doing it for world peace or animal rights or some crap like that. But no... I'm not that that awesome person.

I'm doing it for a variety of different reasons. The health reasons behind this are almost limitless. But to summarize... it's basically a detoxification. Detoxing myself of all the craptastic foods I've been shamelessly eating all of my life.

I'm not gonna lie to you people. I'm a bad girl. A very bad girl. I eat loads of fast food, junk food, chocolate, cookies, ice cream, yum, yum, yum... yuck!

It's become like an actual problem. A real addiction. For the past few months I've been wanting to eat better and healthify myself (yes, I just made that word up... making up words is fun), but I wasn't sure how to start. I felt trapped in a bad food cycle. True, it's all in your mind and willpower... but go tell that to someone that believes they're addicted to pot. There's no physical addiction, but the mind is a powerful thing. All we know is what our mind tells us... our reality is how we see, hear and feel it.

Anyway...

A friend of mine recently underwent a fast. He went without food for 10 days straight. When he first brought it up to me I thought he was insane. But when his 10 days were complete and I saw his health improvement and glow of accomplishment, I envied him.

I'm the kind of a girl that digs a challenge. I enjoy an adventure; even if it's on a small, internal scale. So what the heck, why not give it a go?

Just so you know, it's not a TOTAL fast. And it's not a WATER fast. Those are both highly dangerous. This particular fast is called the "Master Cleanse". You drink this special lemon/lime juice made from scratch along with tea at night. But that's it. NO food. NO yum yums.

When I went to whole foods to get the ingredients for the juice yesterday, I decided to buy some chocolate ice cream as my last indulgence. As the cashier rung me up she said, "Oh I know what's going on here." And I was like, "You do!?" She responded, "Yep, one last treat before the FAST."

I was thinking how the fuck did she know that? Hippie.

Then I was like WAIT... I'M the one doing this crap. I'M the friggen hippie. Damn it.

10 days.

Starting from tomorrow.

Will I make it? Can I do it? I hope so! I've endured worse I think.

I write this as I drink my first cup tea. By the way... I fucking hate tea. And I'm not a fan of lemonade. Here we go...